Pre-New Years Revelations

You know, this Fall season has rounded out a pretty rough year for me. So now that we've gotten past the mid-November mark, I'm ready for Amy's New Happy Life: Holiday Season, Round 2.

Along with my "starter husband" debacle (my new saying that slightly takes away the sting), I've had some major friendship revelations (my granny once told me it would be that way, gosh I hate when she's right), made various idiotic decisions (oh Lord don't get me started), cried more than I ever knew I could, and hurt more than I ever thought my heart would be able to handle. But, through all of that, I am now in a much happier place and ready for what the new year holds. I actually opened a fortune cookie back in January or so and have kept that fortune on my mirror ever since:

You learn from falling, not by the fear of falling

I have fallen this year. I have been let down, pushed, kicked around, brought to tears. Some of this I brought on, I admit it. I have so much pride that it's sometimes hard to admit. But in my heart, I know everything that I have ever done wrong and I apologize to everyone who I've ever hurt. Because believe me, I know the feeling.

Here's a poem that I wrote just before my life turned upside down. I just read it again after all this time. Kind of made me laugh because at that moment, I had NO IDEA what I was in for:

Life Through Television~

Have you ever sat down
Just sitting on the couch
Watching a little tv
Thinking about your life?

I did this today
Doing it right now
Thinking about change
But scared of that very thing

What do I do?
Should I live my life
Wonder what could be?
Or just take that grand leap
Into the core of my fear?

I hate being an adult!
Making decisions on these things

But for now, I'm just sitting
Sitting on the couch
Watching a little tv
Thinking about my life.